Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Randomize
