i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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