Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
