So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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