Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
my poor anus
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
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