Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
True college students do jello shots in the library
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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