This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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