We're facebook friends in real life
Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
NOBODY TALKS SHIT ABOUT PANDA EXPRESS
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize
