Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
