her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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