Welp...herpes.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Randomize
