i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
