Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
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