ugly people sure do ruin things
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Woke up in the middle of my kitchen clutching a cheesy gordita crunch
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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