well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
