When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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