everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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