whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Randomize