Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
Even the bartender felt bad for me
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
