I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
He made a toga out of my hot pink bed sheets and cracked an egg on his head. Then he proceeded to alphabetize our DVD collection, which was impressive because I'm 99% sure he couldn't have done that sober.
He yelled at me to keep it in my pants and I replied with I will fuck your roommate as much as I please. Oops
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
