I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
