Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
