just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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