I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
Never underestimate the power of titties
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize