i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I touched a dick in church today
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
