Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I woke up at 2 AM to find them in my living room with a radio flyer wagon full of milk glass plates and a Holstein cow. How am I going to explain this to my landlord!?!
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
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