All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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