I think i peed on brittanys purse
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
My ATM looks so different sober.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
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