please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Randomize
