i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
