Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Randomize
