Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Don't worry, your car is safe with me. I am throwing watermelons out of it at mailboxes and hipster kids.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
