We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Randomize
