Trimmed my pubes and broke your paper shredder. Separate events.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
Randomize
