Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
Randomize
