So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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