Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
Actually considered writing down one of the numbers on the bathroom stall. That's how much I miss vagina.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
