what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize
