just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
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