She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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