the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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