i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
Randomize