His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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