I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
Randomize
