his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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