Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Randomize
