Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
