I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
I can't believe it is only 1:30...I may have to stab myself with scissors for an excuse to go home...
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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