i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
she peed on how many people?
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
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