Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
