did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
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