she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I'm in that weird half-dead, half fucked-simultaneously-in-every-orifice-by-a-bus-and-it-wasn't-a-good-time state.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize
